As I mentioned in my last blog, when I was young, I often felt somewhere on the inside that I did not fit in with my other friends my age. I often heard ”Why can’t you be more like your brother or your cousins?” Or “Why do you always have to do things differently?” Adults have no idea how much harm they can do with words, especially when making such strong statements. It’s sometimes felt like they were saying “We don’t like you the way you are” or “We like your brother or cousins more.” And that was often very hurtful. I didn’t know why I did things differently. I just did. Sometimes I even thought “Well, maybe there is something wrong with them and not me.” In the end, that ended up not being true either, but it was still very confusing.
I looked very similar to them, but I couldn’t seem to comprehend my feelings at the time. Later in life as an adult, I found myself not being much different when I was a kid. Still an outsider, loner at times, different where in my interests and was more interested in what was happening in the world than the usual gossip of who was dating who.
So what was wrong with me? What was different? Then I realized. Nothing!
Granted, from the outside we all seem to look very similar, but on the inside each one of is one of a kind. Each and every one of us is born with a unique DNA equipped fully with different gifts, talents and abilities so we can create and live our own special life. Each one of us contributes to society in our own unique way. And there’s nothing wrong with being different. In fact, more often than not, you’ll find that what set you apart from others is often the best qualities about you. It is what makes you special.
Often being different physically, emotionally, mentally or spiritually can be hard, not just for us to accept but for others to allow us to flourish in our uniqueness. Just look around, you will find people who are in the creative field, high achievers, special Olympics and business individuals who at times were ridiculed because they danced to the beat of a different drum, but deep down inside that they had a purpose to fulfill. They were given a special gift that they needed to nurture, educate, and expand it so it can create its magic in the physical world.
So think about the magic that you have inside of you… have you found it yet? Start exploring it, expressing it, give it air to breath and at the same time, look around and see the magic within your friends and all the people around you. Accept them for who they are. You know, there is a genie inside every single one of us just waiting to come out to help us create our own brand of magic called life.
From Silva the Genie:
Recently I’ve met so many kids out there who’ve dealt with bullying. It’s so sad to see that still happening in the 21st Century. Being a kid is hard enough, without having to worry about a bully. I remember when I was a kid, I was always a little different. Always outside of the crowd and that meant I had my own share of bullying to deal with. Dancing to the beat of my own drum and thinking outside of the box was just my way of doing things, even though others around me often thought I was just being difficult or doing things the hard way. Sometimes it was hard to be myself. Even more so because I didn’t always get along with my peers. Other kids saw me as weird, while adults often praised me for being smart and ahead of the times. Either way, it was very easy for me to feel like an outsider.
I can ever remember one time,when a girl pushed me into a fight after school because the boy she liked was more interested in me than her! The other students around us egged us on, excited. “Fight, fight, fight.” They all yelled as they followed us home that day just to watch the fight.
Now, I won’t lie. I was scared! But certainly wasn’t going to let her know about it!
You know how when you’re scared, and your face feels hot, but your hands feel cold and maybe a little sweaty? That’s how I felt as everyone closed in yelling “Fight, fight, fight.” I wondered if anyone would try to stop it, but no one stepped up to protect me, or break us up. Not even when she came from behind and pushed me on the ground. Everyone laughed, and seemed to feel better about it. The fight was over, wasn’t it? It seemed that way for a moment. Then, I became angry! I picked up my school bag and swung it around hard! It hit her and she fell, just like I had a moment ago. Now everyone began to laugh even harder. After that, when there was nothing else to see, everyone went home.
Looking back, I realize now that maybe I did the wrong thing when I hit her back. Don’t get me wrong! You should always stand up for your self, no matter what!
But violence should never, ever be the answer to a problem and sometimes the best way to stand up for yourself is to walk away, before you say or do something you might regret later.
I think we both learned a lesson that day. She never attacked me again and I learned what it meant to stand up for myself, for the first time. It’s been a long time since I was a kid, being bullied. Now,
I see so many smart kids who are way ahead of their peers, hold themselves back. Some don’t want to move up to other classes and leave their friends behind, while others fear being laughed for being different, or being labeled a “nerd” a “freak”or a “weirdo.”
As the genie, I say that is wrong! Just imagine what you could be doing if you didn’t hold yourself back! Your gifts and talents are special to you and you alone. If you hold yourself back because of what other people think, who’s losing out then? What’s the motto?? Don’t give up, walk away, make your mark and stand up for yourself!
Recently, I worked with a successful business woman who is desperately seeking to implement procedures in her office that will help her to spend less time solving the problems that her staff is constantly running into. She had come to the point where she would constantly keep her office door closed, so she would not be disturbed. She said, “I can never get my work done, or have the opportunity to bring in new business, because I am constantly solving their problems.” So I asked her to repeat that statement again, but asked her to listen to what she had just said.
As repeating it, her eyes opened up wide and she screeched, “Why did I hire them in the first place!” That’s right. Why did you hire these people? You are a leader, not a problem solver; that is why you had hired them. Granted, a few leaders enjoy being known as the problem solver, it gives them an air of importance; but believe me, this process is only encouraging co-dependency relationships and we all know that is not a healthy place to be. Business owners are the leaders of their organization, the visionary whose main mission in the office is to fulfill that vision and expand the business.
If you are constantly solving everyone else’s problem, then who is solving yours?? Good leaders come to realise that their most able resource in any problem situation is the people around them. Just as problems do not occur in the vacuum, neither do solutions appear from thin air. It is a mistake for leaders to think that they must solve every problem by themselves. Problem solving, like leadership in general, requires participation of others. Input is needed from all those involved (clients, staff, vendors) before a leader can make hard decisions and set direction for an organization.
There are concrete steps that leaders can take to address problems. Effective leaders are not only proficient in solving problems; they are also skilled in perceiving issues before they become problems.
In this case, the client had two choices: either fire the problem staff or re-interview them and in definite terms make clear what you expect from them. Be sure to inform them, that the next time they come to you with a problem; they need to think of at least two possible solutions – if one of them fits into your decision making process, then that’s the one you will go with. This process will guide them to open up their minds to possibilities, to explore the situation at hand, and personally seek out solutions. And as you confirm the process with them, slowly they begin to expand their confidence level and begin to make firm decisions on their own.
This method can easily apply in your home life; do your kids or spouse constantly come to you with problems, looking for you to solve them. Perhaps it’s time for you to change the process and include them in the decision making process.
This will not only benefit you, but you’ll also be helping them become more responsible and solution oriented thinkers… and heaven knows we could use more of that in our society!
There is nothing better than doing what you love to do! Period. Teaching the kids how to do that is magic!
Spent the last 2 days speaking at Teen Success event in Los Angeles and it was exhilarating. Sharing with teens, parents and teachers the power of the T.E.A.R Formula to success instantly gave me the affirmation that doing what you love to do, and make a difference in other people’s lives is the best way to live. Within minutes I heard such uplifting responses, and I was encouraged to meet so many amazing students who truly have good head on their shoulders, just looking for guidance towards fulfilling their dreams.
I met Stephanie, 9 years old going on 20. Talented singer who stared very young and has a clear vision of where she is going in life. 9 years old. And if that wasn’t enough to excite you, her brother Michael who is 15 told his mom at the ripe age of 4, he wanted to play the piano! And he played it masterfully. There was Max, who constantly raised his hand to answers the questions that I through out from the podium, and had smart answers. He wasn’t short on other talents also. Soon you will be hearing from these amazing kids.
These kids are lucky to have amazing parents who listened and watched their children’s inner talents and encouraged them to follow their dreams. Bravo. I am sure that, many parents out there would love to be the position to do that, but they either lack the finances or more importantly, the art of knowing their children. Here is a tip.
The most effective and valuable energy that you can put into raising your children is, listen to their hearts, believe in them and encourage them to seek out the ways to fulfill their dreams. In time, you or they will find the way to make it come true. Gangofhope.com is one way that I hope to empower many kids and parents in this journey, and we have many other experts and mentors who share the same dream.
It has been a while since I last wrote, but I’ve been busy with, finishing my documentary “Broken Promises” , completing my “Jump-Start Your Student’s Life®” book together with the “Jump-Start Your Teacher’s Life®” books, and producing 2 new gang of hope videos for this site, and soon will announce our “Teen Talent” contest. As you seen most of my work has been student related. When I first began my life development journey, I thought that it was just personal, my own life, little did I realize it would soon turn into a full time business. It’s true that, “what you focus on multiplies” and I learned that the hard way. Being an ADD personality, I tend to have 2 or 3 ..4 things going at the same time, but when I look back at my life and examine the times that I was most successful, it was when I was focusing on just one things.
Lately when I hear so much bad news in the media about teenagers killing one another, bullying, abusing, hurting children and animals, I just can’t stand by and shake my head in disgust and not do something about it. Kids are looking for guidance, I know I use to be once, some may still think that I still am, but in my heart I can relate to these kids and we need to make an extra effort in our education system to connect and ignite passion back into their lives. I know that teachers are overwhelmed with all that they have been assigned to do, but it doesn’t take much to turn your teaching course into a fun and engaging learning experience. In my 2 new books, I share tools and steps for teachers and students that can turn life around in the classroom and at home. Today, kids are far more savvy about technology than most teachers, their attention span is like 59 seconds, so it’s important to connect the classroom lesson to their future goals.
watch this clip and let me know what you think?
Barbara Holliday and Dave Reinitz donated the night of comedy and talent to the foundation. The host Joel Bryant was smooth and well prepared, kept the audience rolling in laughter. His act with his wife Devon, could have caused an uproar with Judy and Bill, but they played along and involved everyone in the act. Dave Reinitz, Michael Rayner and Diane Kawasaki followed one another, keeping us all in stitches. This was definitely a better way to raise funds…laugh all the way to the bank.
Last Saturday I attended the star studded red carpet event by BraveHeart Women, and what an amazing night it was. Marla Maples, Dr. Michael Bernard Beckwith of Agape and his wife Rickie, Courtney Cox and many more..
I was so inspired by hearing women from all walks of life, passionately express in their own words how they deal with their everyday challenges and the ways they wish and do make a difference in someone else’s life. Hearing Delta Burke, one of the stars of “Designing Women” television show, painfully talk about her battle with depression and her weight while on the show. Maya Angelou share words of wisdom, the talented and energized Carol Channing with her husband, an Armenian at that.. Harry Kullijian express deep concerns about our education system, the lack of art programs and creativity. A topic near and dear to my heart, we instantly connected and vowed to make a difference.
Overall, connected with like-mined people is what encourages our dreams, giving it that fire to keep going. Each one us can make a difference, in someone’s life, in our own way…
Helen Keller once said, ”I am only one; but still I am one. I cannot do everything, but still I can do something. I will not refuse to do the something I can do.”
What is the one thing that you can do??
A couple months ago I blogged about getting to meet the inspiring author Don Miguel Ruiz. Now, just a short time later, I am happy to say that Don Miguel Ruiz has joined the gang! Dreams do come true.
We’ve been working closely together and are preparing to launch a national one dollar campaign to help Adopt-A-School in need. The one dollar campaign is so important especially now that there are continuous budget cuts for the education system. Each one dollar will move us towards providing schools with onsite and online training and will help to Jump-Start local students and teachers lifestyles and change the world. It’s all being launched very soon so be sure to check back and see when I’ll be appearing in your city!
Last night at a special event by Advance I heard CNN’s journalist Michael Ware talk about his incredible journey from Brisbane to Baghdad. He has lived the ‘War on Terror’ since 9/11, first in Afghanistan, then spending six years in Iraq as a front line journalist. Having a family myself in Baghdad, I was floored when I heard some of the horror stories and what is planned next for Iraq.
He talked about:
It was obvious to see how his up-front and personal experiences in these troubled regions have immensely carved him up to be one of the best journalists out there. It was refreshing to see him laugh, (see photo).
*Being kidnapped by Al Qaeda and surviving
*Dodging death every day
*Living in Baghdad near-continuously since before the American invasion
*Being embedded with American and British forces
*His views on American media
*The changing landscape of international media
Being an author, I have had the pleasure of meeting many inspiring authors such as Patricia Montandon, Deepak Chopra, Mark Victor Hansen, Jack Canfield and so on. 7 years ago, after my book was first published, I came across a little book by Don Miguel Ruiz, titled “The Four Agreements.” Immediately, I knew that I needed to personally connect with Miguel Ruiz to further explore my philosophy about life. I located his phone numbers and attempted calling him several times, but never had the courage to leave a message. Today, 7 years later, on my birthday, I met with him, we hugged as if we have known one another a lifetime. perhaps we have. Listening to this master speak washed away all doubts about my own beliefs about life, kids, love and the future of mankind. His casual manner of speaking and simple methods of translating what is important in life resonated within my soul and I know that we have much work to do. For now I would like to induldge my spirit with the teachings of today, and more on this later.